Love is.......!

" Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek it's own, is not provoked; does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails!"

I Corinthians 13:4-8a

I am sure that everyone has heard these verses before, especially at weddings! We all love the idea of love being all these things. We often hold our spouse and those that are close to us accountable to these standards of love. Recently I have been quite challenged in my own heart about the way that I love others. I so often find myself being inpatient, unkind, jealous, acting unbecomingly, seeking my own way, provoked, harboring hurts, and so on and so on. 

 When I was growing up I had several girl friends that were close to my age. When we were 5 and 6 years old we all played together and enjoyed each other. A few years went by and that seemed to change. It was all about being best friends and you could only have one best friend. And if you didn't watch out your best friend could be stolen from you and you have to find a new one. It was a vicious game that as small girls we played. Our poor mothers probably didn't know what to do with us.We didn't learn until we were teenagers that we could all get along and we didn't have to have exclusive best friends.As I think back to this time in my life I see some humor in it, but it also makes me very sad. As young girls we wasted so much time competing with one another. It also makes me sad because even as a young adult female I see this still going on. Sadly I see so much of it in the "Christian world."

 I am not sure what it is like for a man, but I know for women it can be very difficult for us to treat each other with this kind of true love. We say that we love each other to each others faces, but then we act differently when the other one is not around. We speak unkindly about each other, we are so often jealous of one another. We are not patient with each others struggles and instead tear each other apart at the first sign of weakness. We want it our way when the other one disagrees with us. We say we will bear each others trails and endure life together, but when it comes right down to it we are only going to stick with you as long as you agree with us. 

 What a sad scenario we have so often created. I wonder what the "world" would think of us if we really loved each other. There is a song that says "They will know we are Christians by our love." Sadly I wonder if  the opposite is really the truth, they know we are Christians because of the way we devour each other. Today I pray that God will stop me from devouring other believers and help me to love them where they are at. Maybe the other person is wrong, maybe I am the one that is right, but I need to let God deal with their heart. I am responsible to be patient, kind, not jealous, not arrogant, not seeking my own, not provoked, not recording wrongs done to me, not rejoicing in unrighteousness, believes, hopes and endures the truth, and always loving to my fellow brother or sister in the Lord!

The Power of Pain!

 Last evening my husband was gone to a meeting, the kids and I were home. We had a a fun evening of reading, playing games and watching a little movie. It was time for bed and so off they went to get ready. I read them a couple of books and then began to pray with them. While I was praying my son begins to cry. I asked him why he was crying and he said, "I don't know I just love Jesus so much!" My heart was sad and glad all at the same time. I hate to see my children cry and yet this was amazing to see how soft his heart was to God. This is the boy who was born very strong willed. He was miserable to potty train. He told us, at the age of three, that he would poop on the floor, but not on the potty. I can laugh about it now, but then I was so frustrated. I remember one time he was sitting on the potty, and was his determined self, refusing to use it. I began to cry and said to God what am I to do with this child. If I cannot get him to use the potty how will I be able to get him through much harder things in life. So many times I have prayed these words to God. How will I be able to reach this child's heart. And then God just does it! My son is breaking, his strong will is fading and I am amazed at how God is doing it. Trust me it is not because of me, it is only God.
 A year ago my husband and I decided to put our son in public school. It is a decision that did not come easy and forces us to our knees very often. We felt like our children needed to learn to live in the world while they were still under our roof. I knew that sending him to public school would mean that he would learn things that I did not want him to learn. I knew he would learn about false religion, I knew he would learn some swears, and I knew that he would learn about sex a lot sooner than I really wanted him to. But we strongly felt God telling us to put him in public school, as opposed to Christian School or Home School.
 Over the last few months my heart has hurt and cried out to God. My son has come home with new words that we do not use, new attitudes that we do not have and has leaned the male and female body part names. Before you think it is all bad let me say that he has also learned how to read and write and count, so I can't say it is all bad. I think as a parent it is only natural to want to protect your child from sinfulness and hurt. We want our children to never experience pain and sorrow. The question that I want to ask is Does God do this with us? We are his children and does he always protect us from pain and sorrow? If your answer is yes I am amazed, because it was not this way for my life.
 As a teenager I went through a very painful experience. I knew Jesus as my Savior, but He did not stop this from happening to me. He allowed it to take place. Some would say we live in a fallen world and we cannot expect everything in life to go smoothly. I agree to a point, but let me tell you why I think God allowed this to happen to me. I believe that God loves me and that He wants me to grow closer to him and to trust Him more. When this happened in my life I was devastated! I felt helpless and there was no one to help me. I did know if I could trust God because I felt like He had let me down because my perfect little world had been disturbed. I thought that if you were a Christian that things would be perfect and they were for so many years. It was through this painful experience that my faith grew like never before. It forced me to go to God and work it out. It forced me to learn to forgive and give grace to others.
 So many years have gone by and I look back and tell the story with tears in my eyes still. I share the story with people not because I hate God for allowing it, but because I love Him more for allowing it. I am thankful for all He taught me through it and is still teaching me.I often wonder if my faith would have become genuine had I not gone through what I did. I am thankful that God did not protect me from the hurt, but instead walked with me through it.
 This is what I think for my kids. I don't want to protect them from the hurt and the pain that God might allow them to go through so that they can be closer to Him. I think as parents this is difficult, but last night I saw the blessing of letting my kids experience a little pain. Since my son started school we have had the opportunity to really teach life lessons to him. We have watched as his once so strong willed heart has softened to us and more importantly to God.
 I know that there are many arguments for how we should school our children in the Christian world. I do not write this to state my argument, nor do I wish to entertain arguments about such things. I simply share this as my life experience I pray that it might encourage you today that it is not always a bad thing to experience pain if it brings us closer to God! We all experience pain in this world, it is up to us what we choose to do with it. We can harbor bitterness and a resentful spirit inside of us or we can choose to go to God with it and allow him to heal us and teach us!

Wounds that need a Healer!

 Have you ever had one of those cuts that is so deep that it takes a long time to mend or maybe a broken bone that takes a long time to heal. When I was ten years old I broke my right hip. I was riding my bike to school when I hit a bump and lost control of my bike and landed at the bottom of a hill in extreme pain. Even though this was more than 20 years ago I still remember the pain. I think this is why I am such a baby about pain today! My mother took me to the hospital and after x-rays and what seemed like a very long wait the doctor came in to tell us I had a broken hip and that I would need surgery immediately. Some time later I woke up in a recovery room with three screws in my hip.

 My mother had to home-school me for a couple of months because the doctor did not want me going to school and risking another fall. I walked with crutches for three months or so and then I went to a cane for a few more months. I was so happy to go back to school and be with my friends! A year after my accident I had to have another surgery where they removed the screws from my hip. When they went to prep me for surgery they had hoped that they could make an incision where they had a year before to remove the screws, but they couldn't they had to make a new cut because I had grown and my skin had grown along with me. So now I have two rather large scars on the top on my right leg.

 When I think back to this situation I am reminded that just like a bone that is broken takes time to mend, so do wounds to our hearts. I don't know about you, but when I have been hurt I don't just wake up the next morning feeling lucky ducky! I hurt, I cry, I pray! I do this day after day after day! I beg God to take away my pain and to heal me! Sometimes it is only takes a few days, sometimes it takes weeks or even months for my soul to be healed.

 I share this because maybe you are like me and I want to say to you never give up. Always believe that God will bring complete healing. It may not be today and it may not be tomorrow, but it will come. And just like my body had grown in a year while my hip healed, I am reminded that my soul always grows while the Lord is healing it. When I choose to give my hurt to God I always end up stronger! I always end up with more faith in God and less faith in myself. I always end up receiving a whole lot of grace and learning to give grace where it is needed. So even though the wound was hard to bear I can say that after it is healed I am better than I was before I was ever wounded!

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

James 1:2-4